BREAKING NEWS: The Self-Appointed Minister of Accountability

Every nation has one.

The citizen who arrives on Day One, looks around for exactly five minutes, and confidently announces:

"I have solved politics."

Within hours, our newest expert had a complete national recovery plan:

Rebuild the economy? ✔️

End anarchy? ✔️

Create jobs for everyone? ✔️

Personally message every citizen? ✔️

Rebuild the armed forces? ✔️

End wars? ✔️

At this rate, we're surprised breakfast wasn't included.

Then came the daily accountability campaign.

Every sunrise: "Government, explain yourselves!"

Every sunset: "Government, resign!"

One has to admire the consistency. Alarm clocks have fewer notifications.

The funny part isn't asking questions. A healthy democracy needs that.

The funny part is acting as though posting "Resign!" every few hours is the same thing as presenting evidence.

Criticism is valuable. Evidence is priceless. Repeating the same slogan louder doesn't magically create either.

To our readers around the world enjoying the spectacle: don't worry—our democracy is alive and well. We even have professional commentators who can solve every national issue before their morning coffee.

As always, this newspaper welcomes scrutiny, debate, and accountability.

We simply ask for one tiny thing in return:

Bring facts. The memes are free, but evidence is still required.

The Empire

BREAKING NEWS: The Self-Appointed Minister of Accountability

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